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August 15, 2004
Hazards of the job...
So last night, my restaurant was invaided by cars that did not belong to my guests. My entire parking lot was full, and restaurant was almost empty. So I decided to have a tow-a-thon. I had all of my two tables I had in house tell me what kinda cars they had, and the rest where on out the parking lot door.
I was on a roll. I was up to 8 cars when this silver BMW 320 parked right under the "Your car will be towed at your expence" sign. He was all metro-sexual'ed out. Kinda cute, and I could tell he had this evil auora about him by the way he talking to his friend who was getting out of the car with him. I told him I was going to tow his car unless he moved it. "Do what you gotta do" he said and walked across the street where all the other evil car dropper offers where going. I dialed my tow truck campnay and his car was towed. It made me happy.
Two hours have passed, and he comes in asking for the "Asshole who towed my car?!?!" I thought to myself, well this will be fun. I went over to him and told him "well, I did what I had to do" He started to yell "I'm gonna kick your fat ass!" "Excuse me?!" I screamed. Now I'm pissed. "Fat ass?!? Do you know how much weight I lost you sorry excuse for a metro-sexual!" The look on his face told me he was going to get a tad bit louder. "I'm gonna kick your sorry ass now!!" He stumbles towards me by the cash register, I could smell the beer from his breath a mile away. "Let's take this outside!" I didn't my now 6 tables to feel icky because of a drunk dumb ass!. He slurs, "Who the hell do you think you are towing my car!" "I think I'm the guy who warned your ass I was towing cars as you ran across the street!" Folks were know lining up to see what was going to happen next. "I'm gonna fuck you up!" He yelled as he pushed my left shoulder. The it hit me, he realy was gonna hit me. I decided to take him up on his threat. "Go ahead, hit me! You see, I'll be on workers comp. and get to stay home while you go to jail and get to be someones' bitch! Go head!" The crowd was laughing and I couldn't help but smile myself. "You don't even know my name muther fucker" he said as he filled the air between us with his spit. "Hello! Dumbass! I had your car towed! They can find your information hrough D.M.V.!" I'm not sure what was going on inside his head, but he gave me a look of confusion. "I'm gonna wait for you to get off muther fucker!" Again, he said while spitting.
He did what said and waited. I called the cops who showed up rather quickly. God was he cute! I almost wanted to do a crime just so I could get searched. "what's the problem" sexy cop said to me. I pointed to the drunk BMW boy and said "He's my problem! and him to! Pointing to his friend. "Hey leave me out of this" "Riiight, your just waiting here for you health right?" I growled back. At this point drunk dumbass started to walk away. "Do you wanna press charges?" Woofy police-guy said. I wanted to press something, but it wasn't charges. No, but if the restaurant get broken into or any damage happens, he should be the first suspect. I had to call the tow truck company to get drunk dumbass's info and give it to my future ex-husband. He gave me a hand shake, I sighed, he left, I smiled. It was a good night after all. Mmmm touching a yummy police officer. Now I had a fantasy for my next self satisfaction session.
Posted by roque at August 15, 2004 09:41 PM
Comments
LOOOL ... Oh my God was that tragic! Be careful, though, Rogue. Those drunks can be very vindictive.
Posted by: Somah at August 16, 2004 01:24 PM
LMAO.
WOW, drama with a nice ending. Hey, call the drunk guy and ask him to come back for a second round, that way you get to see the cop ( beeffy cop) again. Oh, and do not forget to take a pic this time.
Posted by: LB at August 16, 2004 05:13 PM
Hmmm, not a bad idea... ;)(he had a few chest hairs coming out of his undershirt he was wearing. I drolled. This means I'm gonna have to keep my camera in the car at all times now for random acts of woofy-ness!)
Posted by: Roque at August 16, 2004 05:55 PM
LOL.
Ready for the woofy-pic?
Posted by: LB at August 16, 2004 09:23 PM